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Am I justified to be this upset that my best friend didn't choose me as her brides-maid?

We been friends for 9yrs. we lived together sharing the same bed for 2yrs @ University. I was gonna make her my brides maid! she has chosen people I don't even know! Shall I tell her how upset I am or shall I just let things be? 53 mths ago

Best Answer

Maybe you are not really her best friend

53 mths ago

Answers -

No, some people keeps it within the family. My niece did this with her wedding..

53 mths ago

Just let things be. It is her decision after all.

53 mths ago

I know that feeling... Been there. All I alway say is "The brides are scared that I'll take all the attention from them. I'm way too sexy & no one will concentrate on the bride." Which is true most of the time anyway. Take it as a compliment.

53 mths ago

Try and get over it, it is one of those knocks we all get in life.

53 mths ago

Evox?

53 mths ago

No. Weddings are hell for everyone involved. Don't add to her stress if you want her to remain your 'best friend'.

53 mths ago

You have to be a cool chick about this.

53 mths ago

Maybe it has something to do with you two "sharing the same bed for 2yrs" thing?

53 mths ago

Thats lame. dont worry ur still a cool chick:)

53 mths ago

They could be family members, but I think place can always be made for another person who means something. From a catty point of view, maybe she thinks you will look better than her. :-)

53 mths ago

A wedding is never a bride's own. She is always under pressure from family and future in-laws to choose cousins, sisters etc as bridesmaid and must consider finances (like deliberately choosing a bridesmaid who can afford her own dress). Some brides also choose strategically: someone they know will happily serve her hand and foot, not cause drama, cope with the stress and rush and not mind not sitting with her boyfriend at the church and reception.

53 mths ago

No, rather keep it to yourself for now......it's her big day. Instead of asking her to be yours, ask someone else....she will get the message that way. After her wedding day and honeymoon has settled down, you can just matter of fact tell her about it.....

53 mths ago

Be glad, because then you can just enjoy the wedding day and don't have to get involved with all the planning!

53 mths ago

if it is not one of her family memeber's then you have all the right actually screw that if you should be mad anyway if, you should first find out why she didnt ask you if her answer is good enough then you can build a bridge and get over it

53 mths ago

Why would you want the responsibility? You will be doing more work that night then having fun. You should see this as a great reason to have a blast at the wedding.

53 mths ago

There is often family pressure. And if the family are paying a lot of money for the affair, they have a lot of say. I am surprised though that she has not said anything to you. If you are best friends, I would have expected that she would. She must know that you are wondering what is going on.

53 mths ago

nope it was her choice after all ...might be unconsidered of her but still her choice

53 mths ago

My best friend chose someone else to be her daughters Godmother.It hurt at the time but you have to get over it without making any fuss.We are still best friends and she hasn't seen the 'Godmother' in over 20 years!

53 mths ago

Cool Chick, there are only a few moments in our lives that are truly life-changing. These may differ from person to person but, in general they are the Big Things - death of a close family member, birth of a child, a major purchase, a wedding. In these pivotal moments, we want - no, need - to be surrounded by people we love and trust, by people who love us and trust us. When I get married, my best friend will be at my side - she has been my confidant, my pillar, my strength, my shoulder to cry on, my deep dark well that holds my darkest secrets. She knows me, she loves me and I can't think of anything on God's green earth that will keep us apart at the times and moments of our Big Things. If you friend CHOSE not to have you at her side at this momentous occasion, and she CHOSE to have someone else on her special day, then your friendship is less important in her eyes than it is in yours. It hurts you, I can tell, and I understand why. It feels like betrayal. Maybe, in this Big Thing, she is making a new path in life and leaving the old behind, and making place for new things, new people, new best friends. As her best friend, through your hurt, you have to allow her to leave and let her go to her new life. For her sake, and because you love her, hide your pain and be happy for her, but realise that things will - may - never be the same again. For the years that are behind you, for the love that you share, for all the times when you were her best friend and she was yours, forgive her for this hurt and be happy for her and, hard as it is, prepare to lose her. Maybe the traditional thing about 'something old, and something new' on one's wedding day holds more wisdom than we realise. Take care.

53 mths ago

Get something fabulous to wear, get a hot date, look like a million dollars go to the wedding and have a blast! She obviously doesn't value your friendship like you do. Just leave it be. You know what to do at your wedding now!

53 mths ago

I, too would be upset but it seems strange that you do not even know the bridesmaids - so it is not family that she has chosen. Just let things be and do not say anything that might upset your friendship - guess you will reciprocate when it is time for you to get married.

53 mths ago

Just tell her that you and her fiancée had a short fling, but that you are sure that he is over you now.

53 mths ago

Let it go! It's her wedding day and probably wants someone else to complement her wedding day in a way that you maybe can't. Just because u were going to ask her be your bridesmaid doesn't mean she needs to conform to your way of thinking. You complement her in other ways and if you want her to think the way you do, you'll eventually end up losing her.

53 mths ago

I do not blame you for feeling so upset, angry and hurt about it. I would feel exactly the same way. But Bianca is spot on. Just think of it that way, and you just turn up at that wedding looking like a million dollars. Make every head turn your way. Steal her thunder if you can. She did not do the right thing. And even if it breaks you up...you enjoy that wedding, smiling on every single photo. Don't let anyone know how you really feel. Woman are strong.

53 mths ago

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